(Ex)Husband has decided that I must be autistic. One of his reasons is that there is a high incidence of autism in my family, a fact that I cannot deny, although just because others in the family have an ASD it doesn’t mean that I have. His other reasons are less sensible, however.
It is apparently a sign of autism to want to live in a clean and tidy house. Oddly, most people that know us would say that our home is certainly NOT the cleanest/tidiest in the world; it is hard to keep the place spic and span when you have (real) autistics about the place who go into meltdown if you dare to tidy up any of their ‘displays’ of junk. (Ex)Husband also keeps rabbits and allows them to hop around the house, spraying their droppings behind them. Attacking these with the vacuum cleaner is a sign of being autistic, he says, as is asking him repeatedly to clean out their hutch in the hope that they might then spend some time in it.
Another of my ‘autistic ways’, according to (Ex)Husband, is the set way I arrange books on the shelf. No, they are not sorted alphabetically or even by subject, they are set up in size order, largest at each end. I do this because it makes maximum use of the space available – by having all the smaller books in the middle of the row, you can squeeze a few paperbacks in as well. To me, this is common sense, to him, autism.
It is also autistic to arrange foodstuffs according to type, such as grouping cans of baked beans, soups, etc together in the cupboard. My reasoning: on opening the door, you are instantly aware of how much of any particular item you have in stock. His reasoning: autistic!
If I am the one putting the shopping away, I will arrange the stuff I put in the fridge in the same way, while he piles it anywhere he can. When he has done the putting away, food is frequently overlooked and found mouldering away when the next shopping list is prepared. In my view, this proves that my method is the one that works. In his view, it proves only that I must be autistic as “they like arranging things in a certain order, don’t they?”
Try as I might, it is impossible to get him to understand that I am not arranging things just for the sake of arranging them; it is because I feel this is the most efficient way to accomplish the task in hand. Bearing in mind his refusal to see reason, it strikes me that if one of us IS autistic, it is most likely him!